three big mistakes

I haven't talked much about our new place.. yet.  Trust me, it's coming.  You'll be tired of hearing about it by the time this is all over with.

We had been looking and thinking about moving for over a year now.  I think I first started looking at listings as a distraction during wedding planning when I felt myself getting too obsessed with the Big Day.  I had always loved the idea of building a custom home, but I thought it was too far out of reach.

I started by casually looking on realtor.com and local MLS listing sites -  we didn't have a real budget in mind (Mistake #1) and weren't really sure what we wanted or were looking for (Mistake #2) and we really didn't have a set timeline in mind (Mistake #3).  However, I think all of our mistakes ended up leading us to a house that I think will be perfect for us for a long time.

Let's talk about these big bad "Mistakes" and what they meant to us.

Mistake #1:  No real budget in mind -  This meant that we were looking at houses anywhere from $100,000 below our (later determined) budget to many many MANY hundreds of thousands of dollars over our budget.  I think this helped us because we were able to see features in the pricey homes that might not be standard in homes in a more modest budget, while at the same time seeing how homes can vary so much for the cost.

Showcase Home -  beautiful but with a dose of quirk.  

For example, we toured a show home that had been featured in local and national magazines.  It was in the "insane" price category, but we thought it would be fun to check out.  Surprisingly, we didn't love it.  We actually preferred the floor plan and structure of some other less expensive houses.  Sure, the finishes and features were lovely -  and there were a few ideas and concepts we've incorporated into our new home.  But a lot of it just seemed to not be a good use of space and just seemed there were odd choices made for the sake of cool design.

It was okay, but as the man said - "Not worth moving for." 

Another example was a house that was about fifty to sixty thousand more than our first home.  It was in a different neighborhood which wasn't as convenient as ours, but had the prestige of a different zip code.  It was also a new build and had about 500 more square feet than our first.  However, walking through we realized that the cost difference was for the zip code.  The house felt cramped and the finishes just didn't feel any nicer that our (at the time) current place.  If anything, it felt cheaper and almost disposable.  That house started us looking into the actual builders of the homes - thinking about the differences between builders and finishes at different price points.

I didn't love the front elevation, but the inside was just lovely.  

Finally, the one that got away - this is the house that we knew was over budget.. not insanely so, but enough that we knew we couldn't afford it within the next few years <cough> ten years <cough>.  Still, we loved it.  We toured it 3 or 4 times.  We brought family to tour it.  They loved it too.   It had a grand, and I mean GRAND entryway.  It had wrought iron stair railings, closets for days, and a massive kitchen.  It became the one to beat.


Mistake #2: No idea what we really wanted - This became much more refined over time.. but when the process first began, our main goal was something bigger.  No specific square footage. No room requirements, really.  Just bigger.

Having no set requirements meant we were all over the place.  We toured lake houses, looked at acerage online, researched neighborhoods in 3 different towns, and quickly learned what types of houses were No's and what equaled a Hell-No.  I also quickly figured out key terms that got the Man interested, and that made him veto immediately.

"Waterfront" =  "When can we tour? How much is it?"
"Acerage" =  "Can it get fast speed internet?"
"Older", "Remodeled", or "Victorian" =  "Nope.  Nope, nope, nope."
"New Build" = "Interesting? How much? Where is it?"
"Big garage" = "Where is it? What does the house look like?"

This helped a lot.  The same went for me.  I was drawn to similar features and I learned that if there wasn't a picture of the kitchen, or I didn't like the kitchen -  it was a no-go.  A TON of houses were screened out due to my kitchen preferences.

It just took a lot of time, and then we got to the point that we were super picky.  Our house wish list became enormous. I started to get worried that we wouldn't find a match.  Or at least, a match within our budget.  But, it also helped because we knew exactly what we wanted.  We could rule out houses quickly without worrying that we'd missed out.  It even helped our realtor when we finally got her involved in the process.


Mistake #3 : No set timeline -  When we first started looking, it was just a daydream.  A distraction.  We started to get more serious around August 2014 but knew we had a way to go in order to get the house ready to sell.  Even then, we didn't want to find something and fall in love.. and still have to sell our place.

Still, we kept looking.  Our focus shifted to prepping the house to sell -  with moments of house hunting.  We found a location we liked, but they had plenty of lots available and the builder (or the realtor rep.) was willing to meet with us frequently as we hemmed and hawed over the floorplans, neighborhoods, and options.

We got our house on the market (finally!) in January and that's when we really focused on the house hunt.  But, there was still time.  We expected to be on the market for a while and didn't want to commit fully until our house was sold.

Over time, we became disenchanted with the builder we had initially been drawn to.  After touring probably 10-15 of their houses, it started to feel very.. similar.  Very same. Very... well.. think of it this way:  It was like the cute jock you had a crush on in high school compared to the handsome intellectual bookish mysterious hunk you decide to marry. Kind of a one-note.

But at that moment, the jock was our best bet.  We didn't sign any papers, our house was still on the market, and I was .. as always, trolling and scrolling on every realty site I could find.

One fateful night, we were piled up on the couch watching youtube clips.  I decided to take a little risk.  I bumped up our budget (we had one at this point) on the app and searched for houses just ever so slightly over our comfort zone. I saw a house listed at a new address, in a new neighborhood I hadn't researched yet.  It didn't seem too impressive at first, but it also wasn't finished being built yet. There were only a few pictures on the listing.. but those were enough for me to do a google search on the neighborhood.

Look at the lovely red dirt landscaping and
unfinished exterior.. 

And then a drive by the next day. 

I decided to show the Man the listing.  We drove by that night.  I think we drove by again the following day. On our second lap around the neighborhood, we toured a house next door that wasn't finished yet -  no locks, so just an unofficial tour.  (We did a lot of unofficial touring in new construction.  A LOT.) It was time to see inside the house we liked.. time to call the realtor.

If I have my dates right in my head.. I think we set up an appointment for two days later.  Something like that.. it was all very quick.

We toured it. We marvelled.  We oohed and ahhed. We felt pretty sure we had found our house.

Well.. almost. 

closing time

In case you want a little 90's throwback.. here's a soundtrack for this post. 

We closed on the house on February 26th, 2015.  We both worked that day, and met up at Mom's to head to the lawyer's office. 

I didn't really know what to expect.  At our last closing, when we bought our house, it was just us and the lawyers because it was a foreclosure.  This time.. us, the sellers, would be meeting the buyers.

I was really concerned about making a good first impression.  I think I changed cardigans two or three times, maybe more.  I don't know why I was so worried.. it's not like they were going to back out of buying the house because I wore purple instead of peach.  (For the record, I wore polka dots and pearls... always pearls.)

Can I just say.. it's really awkward to meet the person buying your house?  Like.. how do you make small talk?  For us.. we just talked about how awesome the refrigerator was.

There was paperwork, but not as much as I expected.  We handed over the keys.. the buyer's realtor took pictures, and we were done.  Time to take our check to the bank and go.. home?

We sold our house. We survived. 

The question is now.. how long do we have before we can be home again? 

studio living

Moving day, February 23, 2015,  was surprisingly uneventful. We hired movers and they made quick work of the furniture and boxes that were left.  Other than some pissed off kitties, I think we all survived somewhat unscathed.

Loki enjoying the "Studio"

Then it came time to get settled into our new place.. for now.  My mother has ever so generously opened up her home to us.  We'll be staying in the top floor bedroom of her townhouse, and trying to stay out of her way.  We'll have a bedroom and bathroom to share, and then an open loft for shared storage between our things and the furniture we had to move out of her guest bedroom.  It'll be tight, but I figure I have friends in NYC living in about the same square footage.. so we'll call it the "Studio".

Through the whole process.. the phrase that kept being repeated was "we can make this work" and "OMG we're homeless" or "babe, guess what.. we're homeless."

Not to make light of the serious issue of homelessness.. but there is something about owning a home, and then not.. and owning-a-currently-just-land-but-soon-to-be-built-house-but-not-yet that leaves one will a feeling of loss.. and slight disorientation.

Inari on neighborhood watch at the new place.

A few things stood out to us that first night in the Studio.. it was hot, and our cats were WILD.   Also.. I'm glad we really love each other, and already have quite a few years of cohabitation under our belts.  Small spaces can do some serious damage to a marriage if you don't really love your partner and their empty Mountain Dew bottles.

A rare peaceful moment.

We still had to finish cleaning up the house, so we went back over for a final "quick tidy."  I left my vacuum and a few cleaning tools there.. and this is where the day started to fall apart...I vacuumed the master bedroom.  Emptying the vacuum canister as I went.  Then moved to the guest bedroom.. and then.. heard a horrible noise.  Guys... our NEW (bought on Black Friday) vacuum died when I had 3 rooms left.  To clean.  After we moved. Ugh.

Seriously.

So.. time to break for lunch, and a run to Target to get another vacuum.  I swear, I only cried like 6 times that day.  Once we got everything cleaned, with our new "it'll do" vacuum, we took a few minutes to enjoy the house together one last time.

We sprawled on the floor of the Master bedroom.. and daydreamed.  About what our new house would be like.  About what we'd miss.. and what living in the studio will be like for the next few months.   We dreamed about our porch, and garage, and basement. About new floor tiles, and laundry rooms, and how to decorate for Christmas.  We talked and laughed about what we hoped would work out and the future freak-outs to come. We sat there silent for a bit.. just watching the wobbley ceiling fan spin.  Then we were back.. laughing at how funny it will be to see the kittens in the new house.. Loki running down the stairs with his belly swinging, and Inari finding her perfect perch on top of the kitchen cabinets.

It was the perfect way to end the chapter of our first home.  In love, and hopeful.  Just like when we bought it.

house mei fun

Our closing on the house has come and gone, we've been moved for about a month now.  But I want to back track a bit so that down the line I can remember what it felt like to leave our first home.. and be homeless for a while.  This whole process has really helped me to appreciate home and the pride and comfort of having a place to call "our own."  Let's rewind back to February 23rd.. a Sunday.

The cats were not very helpful when it came to packing.  However, boxes and paper = best toys ever for the kittens.

I spent all weekend packing up everything.. and I mean EVERYTHING but the clothes we were currently wearing, our sheets, basic toiletries, and clothes for the next day.  Think of it like packing for vacation -  but in reverse.  Instead of packing for the next few days.. you're packing everything BUT what you need for the next few days.

Those last few boxes.. I just gave up on organization.  This is where Adam would come in with his black garbage back technique.  I mean.. I'm not even sure what went in boxes together.  I dread unpacking those.

The boxes going to our "studio."

I remember the triumph of having JUST enough boxes for everything.  We bought boxes from UHAUL (worth every penny) and I think I only had one extra that ended up being filled the next day.

Why did we chose to move on a Monday?  Well.. it worked better with the Man's schedule and it gave me the weekend to finish packing those last few THOUSAND boxes.

Not really.. maybe 20 boxes?  15? There were more on the other side of the room, I promise.

I spent some time just walking around the house.. trying to remember what it looked like before we moved it.  Imagining what the new homeowner would love and hate about the house.  And remembering all the stories behind different improvements.

Like the garage door we replaced after a windstorm. "How does metal just bend like that?  I mean, it's metal!"

Or the navy walls in the master bedroom "Never again.  I am never PAINTING again.  Ever."

Or the teal walls in my office "I mean it this time.. I am NEVER painting again.  Ever.  Who does this?  Who thinks this is fun? I hate this stupid angle-y room."

Watching the cats slip and slide on the hardwood floors, after being used to carpet for so long.

Fussing with my Dad about the black cabinets he thought would look too dark.  And his concession that they did, in fact, look "pretty good."

A shot of Adam's beloved fridge and the arch my Dad built for our cabinets.  It had to be "just so" for me and he made it perfect.   Side note -  I still think the black cabinets were the best fix for our beige laminate befores.

We have so many memories in this home.  I am still sad to leave it.. and we've been moved for over a month now.  But back to the story at hand...


After I cried, and laughed (to myself) while walking through the house, it was time for Adam to get home.  We had plans for dinner.. finishing things off like we started them.. with Chinese takeout.

Adam loves MK's Kitchen so much, she's right below his parents on his speed dial.  Seriously.

Our first meal when we moved in was MK's takeout -  sitting in our folding stadium chairs in the middle of the freezing cold living room.  We decided, Why not? We'll keep the tradition going.  We enjoyed the evening -  this time sitting on our comfy sofa and with the heat running.  As antsy as we were, it was late and we needed to get some rest.  

The next day was Moving Day!

an offer you can't refuse

When we decided to sell the house -  I knew I wanted to avoid being on the market for a long time.  As you probably could tell from my last post, the frenzy of showings and the loosey-goosey of it all was starting to get to me.

Through this whole process, I've had to let go of a lot of my routine.  I like routine, I like planning, and I love knowing what's happening and when.  With this -  there was no knowing.  We didn't know about showings until the day of (most of the time, with a few exceptions).  We didn't know if people liked the house, or how it went (until later.. if we got feedback).  We didn't know how long we'd be on the market, living in limbo.  We just had no idea...

.. it drove me crazy.  But I had to just take a deep breath, and trust.  Trust we'd get enough notice to get the house clean.  Trust that we'd sell eventually.  And trust that the limbo was worth it.

Our experience is nothing compared to what many people selling their homes go through.  I can't imagine living in limbo for months.. keeping your home show-ready for weeks on end.  I think a lot of what we did do differently (moving most of our personal items out and hiring an amazing Realtor - and her team) was worth it to get our house on the market and seen by the right people.

We did get some negative feedback, and it's hard.  It's hard to hear anything critical because it's your home.  We worked hard to turn our little rag-tag place into the nest we loved.  We're proud of it.. and it's easy to get your feelings hurt when someone nitpicks or just plain doesn't like it.

But one of the first things our Realtor said, and one of the hardest for most homeowners who are selling to do, is to try to keep emotion out of it.  We tried to.

But after 25 days on the market.. we couldn't keep our emotions at bay.  After a crazy Saturday filled with chaos, particle board, and a last minute tour - the very next day -  Super Bowl Sunday -

we got an offer!!

We.  Were.  Thrilled!  

We were excited, nervous, anxious, and dance-around-the-kitchen happy.   It was a glass bottle coke occasion.  We toasted, we laughed, we were a little sentimental.

It's been a few weeks, and we're finding out the answer to "what do we do now?" and "what's next?"  More on that soon.. but for now, we just continue to count down the days until closing.  It's not official until the papers are signed and check is in hand!

feeling showy

I love and dread a call from the realtor.  Usually when they call me -  they are scheduling a showing, which is awesome news!  It's a step towards a sale, an opportunity for someone to fall in love with our nest, and a chance for us to get a teeny bit closer to our dream home.

But -  that phone call also sets into motion a frenzy like no other.  Sometimes, it's scheduling same day -  sometimes a few days in advance, and sometimes we have about 30 minutes to get ready for a showing.

I knew that part of selling our home would require a level of clean that is far above our natural operating state.  I don't know many people who can avoid a rogue dish in the sink, sock on the floor, or cat litter and toys scattered throughout.  For us, we have been living in a weird state of being both in our home, and acting as if it's on display for the past few weeks.

We've survived the first month -  barely!  But I wanted to share what all we do to prepare for a showing, both in the long term and in the frenetic few minutes before leaving our doors unlocked and fingers crossed.

Long Term:

• Pack up as much as you can.  Clean out the cabinets, closets, nooks and crannies. Seriously!  Live with the bare minimum.  I'm still thinking of things I could have packed and hidden away.  
• Organize your closets.  I splurged on some velvet slim-line hangers after Christmas and it makes our closet look SO much bigger!  It also helps to put all off-season or infrequently worn clothes away. (But don't forget to leave some infrequently worn clothes - like dresses for nice nights out, or ties for special occasions, etc. in the closet.  I've been close to needing to dig in the storage building for proper attire.)
• Plan ahead with spaces to stash everything -  we have a basket in the living room, drawers in the bedroom, moving boxes in closets to hide things in.  
• Keep pet kennels/crates accessible.  Ours stay in the living room for a quick kitten exit!
• Remember that buyers will want to look in cabinets or under counters.  They will be nosy!  Hide the personal, embarrassing items in a spot that would be rude to look (dresser drawers or closed containers).
• Eliminate as many of the personal items from shelves and furniture as possible.  This will help streamline dusting and last minute clean-up.
• If appliances are coming with the house, make sure they are as empty as possible (except the fridge.. we all gotta eat!) and try to give them a good deep clean.  
• This includes the washer and dryer -  our first few showings I just stashed dirty laundry in there.  Now, it goes with me when I leave the house.  Weird, yes.. but not as weird as potential buyers opening the washer and getting a glimpse of our underthings and whiff of our stinky socks.
• Invest in a swiffer, good vacuum, and cleaning supplies that smell clean or fresh.  Nothing floral or overpowering, but you want products on hand that make the house smell as clean as possible.

This turned out to be way more to chat about than I thought.  I'll put my short term showing whirlwind in another post.  It's a lot to do, but it is worth all the effort -  I promise.

feeling showy, part deux

I mentioned before that preparing for a showing leads to a type of frenzy I'm not used to.  We've had over 10 showings so far and through that, we've developed a bit of a system.

Here's what we do in the Short Term to prep for a showing:

This is the whirlwind! It helps if you keep the house as tidy as possible. We've had some messy days with showings and it adds about 15-20 minutes to the prep time.. just in picking up stuff that would have only taken a minute or two originally to put away.

• I'm a fan of Scentsy.  We have two warmers with the same clean scent that I turn on when I first walk in.  Be sure it's a subtle smell though!! 
• Pick a side of the house to start on.  I usually start in the master bath/bedroom.

Master Bath

• Master Bathroom
• Grab paper towels/rag, trash bag, cleaning spray from linen closet.
• Stash toiletries from shower underneath the cabinet.
• Spray and wipe down all surfaces (shower door, counter top, toilet, sink, mirror)
• Fluff towels on racks (the ones we use are stashed in with the laundry)
• Fluff shower mat
• If needed, drop a capful of bleach in toilet for a quick refresh.
• Close shower door, lid down on toilet, turn lights on and hide all items from counter top

Master Bedroom

• Master Bedroom
• Make the bed, fluff pillows
• Open blinds (the more natural light the better!)
• Clear off all flat surfaces, dust if needed
• Gather all laundry and toss in a tote -  run this on out to the car!
• Align all hangers in closet, make sure shoes are tidy.
• Vacuum if needed (usually not - I do this when we don't have showings to keep it fresh and fluffy.. and so I don't have to deal with it on showing days).
• Turn on all lights and fan.

Guest Bath (note the hiding photographer)

• Guest Bath
• Spray and wipe down all surfaces (shower door, counter top, toilet, sink, mirror)
• If needed, drop a capful of bleach in toilet for a quick refresh.
• Fluff shower curtain, lid down on toilet, and leave lights on

Our empty guest room -  the color in here is one of my favorites.

• Guest Room
• We keep this room closed off to the kittens, and there is no furniture in here.  For now, just vacuum as needed.
• Open the blinds and turn on lights and fan.

Living Room (view A above and B below)

• Living Room
• Dust all shelves, place remotes by respective consoles.
• Fluff couch cushions and place pillows.
• Vacuum and try to catch any rogue "kittens" (Our cats shed SO much.. I call the rogue fur tumbleweeds "kittens.")
• Open all blinds, turn on all lights and fan.

Kitchen (still love our massive tile)

• Kitchen
• Clear off counters and empty sink.
• Spray and wipe down all surfaces (counter top, sink, cabinets, range)
• Load dishwasher if there are dirty dishes
• Pull trash and check fridge for potentially stinky to-go containers
• Turn on all lights and fan
• Sweep and steam mop if needed or if time permits (doubtful, but one day we got this done!)

Office - you can see the sun coming in through the huge picture window.

• Office
• This is the last spot of the house, because this is where I keep the litter box and catfood dispenser.
• Pull litter and throw away
• Wipe down litter pan and hide along with catfood dispenser (in a moving box in the closet)
• Round up all cat toys and hide (also in closet)
• Vacuum (necessary) and steam mop if time permits (it usually doesn't)
• Turn on all lights and fan

Last check -  once over:

• Work your way through the house, checking every surface. Making sure all lights are on, surfaces clean, and rooms smell fresh.
• Do a happy dance that you got it all done in time!
• Round up the cats, toss them in carriers, and promise lots of treats and cuddles later.  Note: They do not give a damn about the cuddles.  And treats can only motivate so far.
• Prepare yourself for the psychological damage that driving two angry cats around for an hour can lead to.   They will be pissed.  They WILL let you know exactly how mad they are.  

And finally, get out of the house.  Cruise the dream neighborhood.  Drop the cats off at their grandma's. Drive around the block and park at the ballfields.  Swing by and pick up some chicken nuggets, or a frosty, or just a soda.

All the while keeping your fingers crossed, and hoping that this time -  it's the one. 

This time, they'll think it's just the right size.  They won't complain about lack of bedrooms, or weird paint colors.  They won't worry over a pantry, or a fence. 

This time they'll see all the beautiful touches that made your nerdy nest home -  the custom arches, the vaulted ceilings, the highly-debated paint colors, the perfect porcelain tile, the ginormous fridge, and the spaces made for living.

This time, they'll want this house to be their home, to be their nest.

This time, they'll fall in love and see our home as what we first saw it as -  potential, perfect, and ours.

the nerdy nest